Emily Noble, a health analyst based in Albuquerque, New Mexico, spoke to 20/20 about her emotional reaction to an ex-boyfriend being arrested for a brutal murder that ravaged a small Pennsylvania town for 25 years.
“I was paralyzed for a few days because I was scared, ‘How did I survive this relationship? ‘”How did I get past unharmed?” She said.
Check out the full story on “20/20” this Friday, October 5th at 10pm ET / 9pm CT on ABC
In 1996, Emily Noble, then 25, was a cocktail waitress at the popular Chameleon Club nightclub and bar in Lancaster, Pennsylvania.
“We were a family at the Chameleon Club,” said Noble. “Everyone grew up in Lancaster. We all enjoyed working together. “
Emily Noble can be seen here in this undated photo.
The lounge was known for great music and had a house DJ, Raymond Rowe, who made records on a regular basis. Well known in the close-knit community, Rowe was a sought-after DJ for weddings and events in the area.
“He was very kind and accommodating,” Noble said of Rowe. “He loved talking to people about music because that was his passion.”
Rowe’s good looks, welcoming demeanor, and love of music made him very attractive in Noble’s eyes. And it wasn’t long before the popular DJ noticed the petite green-eyed, blonde cocktail waitress.
Despite his second marriage, the two secretly began dating.
“In the beginning he made me feel good about myself,” recalled Noble. “It was nice to have attention from him and he was also very generous with his affection.”
The couple enjoyed connecting with music and trips to the beach. Two months after the affair began, the relationship turned serious, and Noble says she gave Rowe an ultimatum: either admit to his wife that he was unfaithful or their relationship ended.
Raymond Charles Rowe, 49, is pictured in an undated booking photo released by Lancaster County Prison.
Noble says Rowe told his wife about the affair and the two soon broke up. While Noble looked forward to getting closer to her new romantic partner, the opposite seemed to be happening. Shortly after Rowe and his wife split up, Noble said his relationship with her had changed drastically, too.
“It was less about getting to know each other and having fun,” she said. “It was more about the divorce than our relationship.”
Noble says Rowe told his wife about the affair and the two soon broke up. While Noble looked forward to getting closer to her new romantic partner, the opposite seemed to be happening. Shortly after Rowe and his wife split up, Noble said his relationship with her had changed drastically, too.
“It was a red flag when we met that he was married twice,” she said. “Like every 25-year-old, I’ve made some bad decisions and I’m not remotely proud of that.”
In retrospect, Noble said Rowe was emotionally abusive, controlling, and possessive. Things were “his way or the freeway,” she said.
Noble also said that Rowe toyed with her insecurities by whispering things like, “You are worthless, you are not good.”
The longer the two stayed together, the more frequent insults, defeats and controlling behavior became. Noble admits that one of the reasons she was attracted to the DJ was because of his confidence and strong personality.
“I was never afraid for my life when I was with Ray,” she said. “But he was very scary and intimidating.”
A year into the relationship, Rowe had the opportunity to play for three months in a club in Chile. Rowe was always career-oriented and accepted the offer. Rowe and Noble decided to stay together during this assignment, but the long-distance relationship began to wane and the couple only spoke on the phone once a week.
“When he left, it was probably the much-needed break that I needed to clarify whether I wanted to continue,” said Noble.
When Rowe returned to the States, he and Noble decided to split up and go their separate ways. Soon after, Noble decided to pursue a life and a career in New Mexico and lost all contact with her ex-boyfriend. She hasn’t seen or heard of Rowe since 1997.
The 1992 murder victim, Christy Mirack, is shown in an undated flyer photo released by the Lancaster County District Attorney.
Last July, Noble was on her way to an interview when she received a call from an old coworker at the Chameleon Club.
Her friend told her that the decade-old unsolved murder of popular and bubbly elementary school teacher Christy Mirack had been arrested. The suspect in custody, her friend continued, was Raymond Rowe.
Noble’s immediate answer was, “I’m shocked,” she said. “Really shocked. But not surprised. “
Noble says her first instinct was to call the Lancaster prosecutor for details of what she believed to be an emotionally abusive relationship with Rowe.
Rowe has been charged with criminal murder and sexual assault. He is expected to be tried in May 2019. His lawyer did not immediately return the requests for “20/20” for comment.
Noble is still grappling with everything that has evolved over the past few months. She said she was sick and disgusted for days after the arrest and collapsed when she saw photos of Mirack.
“I looked like her,” said Noble. “My hair was the same color. The similarities between the two of us are there.”
Lancaster County District Attorney Craig Stedman announces charges of murder of Christy Mirack during a press conference at the Lancaster County Courthouse in Lancaster, Pennsylvania on Monday, June 25, 2018.
Emily Noble can be seen here in this undated photo.
Noble realizes that this case is now in the hands of law enforcement, the courts and a jury. Most of all, however, she focuses on helping Christy Mirack’s family finally get the closure they have been looking for all these years.
Check out the full story on “20/20” this Friday, October 5th at 10pm ET / 9pm CT on ABC